Browsing top quotations, sorted by votes.
‹ First < 18 19 20 21 22 >Quote #505
*a teacher is explaining about metallic bonding to Chemistry students*
Teacher: Metallic bonding have high conductivity because of the sea of electrons
Student: ...
*the teacher keeps explaining*
Student: ... *looking confused and look at the teacher*
*the teacher keeps explaining further*
Teacher: The low ionization energy, malleability and ductility are also because of the sea of electrons *writes 'sea of electrons' on the whiteboard*
Student: OHHH!! It's sea of electron. Now it makes sense... I thought you said C of electrons.
Other classmates: bleh -_-"
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Quote #533
Mrs. M.: Tea Cake's real name is Vergeable Woods.
Me: Haha Mrs. M., that sounds like a pornstar name.
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Quote #731
Bard on the beach watching King Lear:
Kahan: You wanna know the difference between us and normies?
Maxim: We are smarter, more powerful, and we actually are culturally trained?
Kahan: No! When we go to these things, we actually want to watch, when the normies go, they just do it to make their parents pay the $15 and get outta class.
Maxim: But we got outta class too....
Kahan: We did something good with our lives...
Maxim: Watch a play with vacuum cleaners, guns, and business suits?
Kahan: Yah.
(5 minutes later)
English Teacher: What are you guys gossiping about?
Kahan: We are talking about the play, really!
English Teacher: Pfft. Tell me what you told Maxim then!
Kahan: We wasted...er... spent the time at the play very well and with a good purpose.
=D
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Quote #219
Thelma after dropping out of IB
Thelma: Hey, I can't stand Math Studies anymore, that's why I dropped out .
Student: Wow that sucks.
Thelma: Yeah, and I heard that AP Geometry and AP Algebra at my friend's school are so much easier.
Student: -_-
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Quote #363
AP/IB Calculus teacher, in an attempt to "engage us":
WHERE DID PI GO? We've been *doing* pi all morning! But this isn't a disc, this isn't a circle. It's a triangle--YA KNOW?
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Quote #1410
What's the difference between a dead person and an IB student?
-NOTHING
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Quote #2107
IB student1: Man, I can't believe I finally remember something I dreamt!
IB student2: Really? What did you dream?
IB student1: I was at home...doing my extended essay...and even in my dream it was hell...
IB student2:......
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Quote #447
Hey Todd! Your epididymis is showing!
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Quote #535
Various quotes from my TOK class discussions
Dr Davey (TOK teacher, biologist)
"Shan't, won't, that's it, I'm not dividing"- on stem cell research
"What data can you get from ten dead insects?"- on marking biology exams
"No love eminating from this patosaurus at the moment"- after being called a medium sized grey animal
"I am NOT a blur. Not even a medium sized grey blur"- still offended about the grey animal thing
"Pigeons are landing very heavily on people's heads at the moment"- going off on a tangent, methinks
"The, er, alternative gender"- talking about men and their 'merits'
Dr Davey is a very special lady. TOK lessons are fun!
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Quote #25
Ms. Shannon (when physics students were studying for a test in her room during lunch time): Why don't you guys go ask Ms. Birsan, if you don't get it?
Students look at each other and smile nervously: Because we are too chicken to ask her?
*collectively shrug*
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Quote #361
Chatting in IB Biology:
IB Girl L: "Yeah, first I had a tumor, then I got cancer, and then--"
IB Girl K: "Whoa! Oh my God! When was this??"
IB Girl L: "Wait, did I just say cancer?"
IB Girl K: "Yes.."
IB Girl L: "Oh. I MEAN, first I had a cyst, then I got surgery!"
IB Girl K: "Well... that's kinda different then, isn't it?"
Both, in a strange tumble of words: "we need to sleep... we've been studying too much...f*cking IB..."
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Quote #530
The 'taster sessions' for prospective IB students.
The IB coordinator has set up a 'speed dating session' for the prospective students to lunch with the current students.
General chatter is happening, most people just eating.
IB coordinator, a man in his 60s, walks in and looks about.
Teacher: Just checking you weren't all having an orgy
Students: *nervous laughter*
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Quote #1680
"Having IB friends over for supper over Easter and to do English we there watching pirates of Caribbean 1"
Jack Sparrow: Consider your own fortunes gentlemen the deepest circle of hell is reserved for traitors and mutineers.
IB Student: Oh great so that's why we don't trust each other.
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Quote #94
IBS: Internal Bowel Syndrome
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Quote #40
Naomi: Guys the end of the play says that, "I'd rather be dead than fat.......that's heavy"
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Quote #122
(After hearing rumors of a Group 4 Project that lunch hour)
Student 1: What the hell is group 4?
Student 2: No idea but apparently we have to go to some meeting.
Student 3: Something to do with us doing some science project together.
Student 2: That's ok then I only do environmental systems.
Student 1: I need to do my World Lit 1.
Student 3: Well I don’t give a @#£$ if you don't go just don’t come asking me when you have no @£%&$"£% clue what to do.
Student 1 and 2: Meh I'll come then no need to do extra work trying to work out what to do in the first place.
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Quote #841
Substitute Teacher: So... you guys are in IB?
Class: Yes.
Substitute Teacher: That's like AP, right?
Class: No, it's different.
Substitute Teacher: But both programs let you earn college credits, right? Then they're the same.
Class: They're not the same!
(A short debate ensues. The sub still doesn't believe there's a difference between IB and AP.)
Vote:
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Quote #174
Substitute: I used to teach from a chair on a table!
Class: ...why?
Substitute: I used to love to do crazy stuff! Which reminds me... I want a bagel and cream cheese...
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Quote #270
[IB Mathematics]
Ms. Frisbie: And this is why God made the table setting. Wait, God made Texas...
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Quote #698
English HL teacher explaining about Julius Caesar.
Student 1 *commenting about the fight between one of the 2 jobless fucks in the play*: "It's like ancient swearing."
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Quote #1233
IB stands for
Its Bullsh**
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Quote #1274
A message fom an IB student to her father:
-Everything's fine except I've got a bad cold and almost no voice. I still went to school and I got my report grades-
He replies:
-You need to take care of yourself, get more sleep.
WHAT GRADES DID YOU GET???
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Quote #388
History IA is a BITCH.
Only, it can't be settled with a fight.
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Quote #1907
Dad: Do you want a Pie?
IB kid: No thanks!
Dad: What's the matter?
IB kid: It's has too many digits, It would fit in my calculator =|
Dad: =_='
- by Sahiti
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Quote #18
Alex: YESMAMNGF sda
Carson: ... What?
Alex: o my god
Alex: i seriously forgot what i was so happy about
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Quote #156
This occurred randomly while walking through the mall.
IB Student: *pointing at other person's feet* Are those really actual shoes??
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Quote #230
I BS CAS hours!
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Quote #406
I want to B ... dead
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Quote #451
A pre-IB freshman econ class...
Teacher: SEX!
Students: *jump up*
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Quote #542
Ms Richardson, English HL Teacher: "I don't understand shorthand. I once had to reply to an email and say 'Sorry, I don't know what you just said.' It was kind of embarrassing actually."
Matt: "Did you actually write out sorry?"
Ms. Richardson: "How else would I write it?"
Class: "Sry."
Karlena: "Or Sree." (ignored) "Or Sr3."
(entire class turns their heads to stare at Karlena)
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Quote #1229
Asian: Yeah, I never went to math camp, isn't that sad?
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Quote #83
"It's so random, it's Chinese."
- About a particular student's odd sense of, well, everything.
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Quote #476
On quote #236
What about the other 1000?
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Quote #754
To be or not IB therefore there is no question
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Quote #213
A student is pretending to cough into a napkin with answers written on it.
Teacher: Um, are you alright?
Student: Oh um the napkin? Yeah um, yes I'm fine.
Girl with multi-touch e-ink interface in the nutrition section of her drink: You know, this has wifi as well.
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Quote #635
IB Bio Student: You're so gay that you get your food by phagocytosis!
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Quote #1338
4 classes X (1 mole of classes/1 class) X (2 moles of homework/1 mole of classes) = 8 moles of homework a day!!!
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Quote #39
Ms Jelena: "If the Hells Angels had stock, I would buy so much of that"
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Quote #935
*Physics, after Grace asked yet another question*
Mrs. Birsan: Ok, im sorry, im going to have to limit you to 5 questions a class, it cant work like this
*2 minute ovation from the class, with Birsan just smiling at her desk*
note: She dropped physics the next week
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Quote #34
(on MSN)
Person 1: Damnit more ITGS homework
Person 2: kawk
Person 2: *lawl
Person 2: omfg...
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Quote #245
Mike: *Throws grape in air and catches it with mouth*
Steph: Ooh! Let me try! *Throws grape in air... doesn't come down.*
Mike + Steph: What the fuck!?
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Quote #325
My A-Level seniors have slogan for IB students:IB no life...IB noob..
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Quote #1279
Stephen Hawkins was the last IB student before CAS came in
yes, he may be smart, but look at his physical state!
- Ben Cole, Queensland Academy for Health Sciences
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Quote #934
Grace: Why is world war one called a world war? I mean it was only fought in like europe.
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Quote #93
Student: Haha, and then he was laughing so hard.
Math teacher: What are you doing?
Student: Nothing...
Math teacher: GET OUT YOUR F..F... FREAKING MATH REVIEW NOW.
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Quote #368
Chem teacher looking at student's hair: Jessica your hair is so long and thick and has just the right curl to it...
Jessica: Thank you?
Chem teacher: and so soft....
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Quote #2086
IB student: woots for bs analysis... i love ib
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Quote #243
Mike: May I have another cookie?
Johana: Sure, here-
Ms. Lauter: Why are you giving him one? He's always making fun of you!
Johana: *Hands cookie* My cookies are golden!
Mike: They look more like white to me...
Johana: That's because I put alot of frosting!
Ms. Lauter: But you deserve it...you really do.
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Quote #606
IB slowly finger fucks you.
It's that bad.
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Quote #137
Maths teacher after deciding his students were working too quickly leaves the room to go and get more questions.
Student 1 drops her pen and lunges for her bag. Student 2 thinks she wants her calcualtor to work it out and quickly puts it on her table. Student 1 looks back up with a clementine.
Student 1: I didn't want a calculator, I wanted this! (holds up
clementine)
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