Browsing top quotations, sorted by votes.1 2 3 > Last ›
Click on the up/plus button if you should be doing some kind of homework right now. Click on the down/minus button, if you actually don't have any homework...haha, yeah right.
Vote: 10179 | Permalink
The day I ditched school for homework.
Vote: 4444 | Permalink
You know you are in IB when you actually laugh at these quotes.
Vote: 4200 | Permalink
You know you're in IB when you procrastinate by doing "less important" homework.
Vote: 4064 | Permalink
teacher to students: now write your name on this notecard.
Student 1: OK
Student 2: This is easy!
IB Teacher to IB students: now write your name on this notecard
IB Student 1: how big?
IB Student 2: which corner?
IB Student 3: cursive or print?
IB Student 4: do we need to put our whole middle name or just our middle initial?
IB Student 5: What if we don't have a middle name?
IB Student 6: Is pencil okay?
IB Student 7: Do you want it on the side with lines or the blank side?
and we are wondering why IB is so hard
Vote: 4056 | Permalink
This is IB, you may pick 2 of the following:
1. Good Grades
2. Enough Sleep
3. A Social Life
Vote: 3972 | Permalink
Writing a TOK essay is like being constipated. It hurts like hell and you produce crap very slowly.
Vote: 3651 | Permalink
Patricia: Do you think they'll have alcohol at the IB Christmas Party?
Genie: ...IB kids drinking? Can you imagine us drunk? We would be like... "HAHA YOUR FACE IS A PARABOLA."
Vote: 3576 | Permalink
Fuck IB, I'm going to Hogwarts.
Vote: 3415 | Permalink
IB pickup line:
Baby, I'll treat you like my homework. I'll slam you on the table and do you all night long.
Vote: 3400 | Permalink
ibquotes.com is a stress-relief for IB students, and a reason to procrastinate while still feeling like you're doing something IB related.
Vote: 3279 | Permalink
IB Student to her aunt: I can't talk right now, this is IB hell week.
Aunt: I hate to break this to you, but real life is harder than highschool.
(IB Student laughs hysterically)
Vote: 3207 | Permalink
If you are in IB and you ever find yourself without any homework to do one evening then one of the following events must be true:
1. You're forgetting something.
2. Something is wrong with your planner.
3. You're about to wake up in a few minutes.
Vote: 3182 | Permalink
Coordinator: Hey Guys! There's a Blood Donation session tomorrow, I hope you can make it!
Student: Do we get CAS hours??
Vote: 3155 | Permalink
Rebel: Sneaks out/in of their house when they're supposed to be sleeping.
IB Rebel: Sneaks around own house to print homework when they're supposed to be sleeping.
Vote: 3154 | Permalink
Student: So I was wondering... Why aren't we allowed to take five HL classes?
IB Coordinator: Because it looks bad for the IB program when students commit suicide.
Vote: 3028 | Permalink
How do you even have time to read this ?
Vote: 2937 | Permalink
From a website:
Procrastination is like masturbation.
It's a lot of fun until you realize you've just fucked yourself.
Vote: 2704 | Permalink
When asked to comment on the IB a student replied: "I'd commit suicide but I don't have the time."
Vote: 2693 | Permalink
Only in IB can you bullshit a 10 page commentary on a poem less than 10 words.
Vote: 2674 | Permalink
Frustrated IB Student: You know what? I don't want to wear a normal graduation cap when i graduate. I want a freaking tiara.
Vote: 2621 | Permalink
When an IB Coordinator says "Jump!" an IB freshmen asks "How high?"
Two years later the IB Coordinator says "Jump!" and the IB Junior asks "Where's the nearest cliff?"
Vote: 2614 | Permalink
IB - the best condom in the world.
Vote: 2523 | Permalink
We you're in IB the phrase "I got five hours of action last night" means something completely different.
Vote: 2474 | Permalink
Teacher is explaining differentiation to the class
SL Maths Student: Are we ever going to use this in real life?
Teacher: Of course.
SL Maths Student: When?
Teacher: In the exam.
Vote: 2454 | Permalink
I used to have a life. Then I started cheating on it with IB, and me and life got a divorce.
Vote: 2409 | Permalink
In IB we don't believe in miracles... We rely on them!
Vote: 2399 | Permalink
*sung to the tune of the 12 days of christmas*
On the first day of IB my teachers gave to me ...
11 long equations
10 mental breakdowns
9 questions begging
8 textbooks slamming
7 days of working
6 broken pencils
5 PAPER 3s!
4 thousand words
3 hours sleep
2 broken wrists
AND A LOUSY MARK THAT KILLED ME!!!
Vote: 2399 | Permalink
ToK in a Nutshell:
The Question: How do we know?
The Answer:We don't.
Vote: 2353 | Permalink
The good thing about IB is that you know that when you're up at three am working on an essay, you can can pretty much call anyone for help because chances are they're up working on that essay too.
Vote: 2286 | Permalink
IB Student: i wish i had a universal remote control
IB Student: i would stop time
IB Student: and then
IB Student: do hw
Vote: 2250 | Permalink
Teacher: "What is the main cause of deforestation?"
Students: *Lifts up their homework*
Vote: 2235 | Permalink
The number 45 never looked so high until now...
Vote: 2225 | Permalink
You know you're IB when you spend more time editing a paper than writing it because you're over the word count.
Vote: 2146 | Permalink
IB Courses: $2400
Exam Retakes: $600
Graphing Display Calculator: $120
English Books/Plays: $50
School Supplies: $100
TOK teaching you it was all for nothing: PRICELESS
Vote: 2104 | Permalink
"You shall not pass"
-Gandalf on IB
Vote: 2099 | Permalink
You decide to laminate your review sheet to study in the shower.
Vote: 2071 | Permalink
Student: Hey I came up with a joke! Want to hear it?
Physics teacher: Okay sure
Student: Okay, what happens when you get stabbed by 1 over T?
Physics teacher: You calculate the frequency of how much you get stabbed?
Student: No, it "hertz".
Physics teacher: Hey you guys do you want to hear another joke?
Physics teacher: I just marked your quizzes.
Vote: 2047 | Permalink
IB Kid 1: Hey, want to hear a joke?
IB Kid 2: Yeah, sure.
IB Kid 1: Our social lives.
(both roll on the floor laughing)
Vote: 2043 | Permalink
Honors Student: So, what did you do for your birthday?
IB Student: A chemistry formal lab write-up.
Honors Student: Well, did you do anything fun?
IB Student: Yes, I managed to get to bed before midnight. It was wonderful.
Vote: 2023 | Permalink
IB helps you with stress management. It throws all this stress at you and says, 'Manage it!' Then you have your breakdown and you get over it.
Vote: 1970 | Permalink
Isn't it funny how in the real world 50 hours community servie is a punishment while in IB its a requirement?
Vote: 1963 | Permalink
Woman: So you are in IB?
IB Student: Yes
Woman: I have heard nothing but great things about IB!
IB Student: *snicker and mumbles*
Woman: What was that?
IB Student: Oh nothing.
Woman: Oh, anyways, I want to get my daughter into IB when she hits High School, what would you suggest?
*IB student and baby exchange terrified glances*
IB Student: Um...
Woman: Oh one second. I'll be right back, here watch my daughter *Hands IB Student the baby and walks away*
*IB student places baby on the ground*
IB student: RUN CHILD RUN! YOUR MOTHER DOESN'T LOVE YOU! GO WHILE YOU STILL HAVE A CHANCE AT LIFE!!!
Vote: 1939 | Permalink
If you think you're doing the IB, you're wrong. The IB's doing you.
Vote: 1910 | Permalink
The realization of actually being in IB hit me when I decided not to wear my seatbelt in the car becuase I would prefer to go to the hospital rather than go to school.
Vote: 1903 | Permalink
IB Student 1: Did you understand a word of that math lecture?
IB Student 2: No, I was finishing the physics homework instead.
IB Student 3: Oh my god, do you understand the physics unit?!
IB Student 2: No, I was doing my math homework during the lecture.
Vote: 1897 | Permalink
During a break in the biology mock exam:
IB Student 1: What's evolution?
IB Student 2: It's when we finish this exam and half of us drop dead so that only the people who are smart enough move on to the next mock.
Vote: 1895 | Permalink
If you are on this site since 5 minutes, you took your break for the week!
Vote: 1759 | Permalink
"IB is like an abusive husband, you know you should leave but you can't because you have a life together even if that life occasionally beats you, calls you names, and makes you feel like killing yourself."- Jordan S.
Vote: 1627 | Permalink
IB puts the "pro" in procrastination.
Vote: 1597 | Permalink1 2 3 > Last ›