Browsing 50 random quotations.

Quote #267

IB English Teacher: After reading your World Lit papers, I wanted to go spend my night drinking and drown my sorrows in alcohol.
*Class roars with laughter*
IB English Teacher: What? I AM over 21, you know.
Student: The legal drinking age is 19.
IB English Teacher: Well, I'm over 19 too.

Vote: Yay! 37 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1418

You know you're in IB when you pray for a snow day to finish all of the work you procrastinated on.

Vote: Yay! 505 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1679

TOK - The day the world became pointless.

Vote: Yay! 599 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1845

You know you need lives when your friend tells you the following:

"So last night I dreamed I was having sex with Hamlet, when Freud walked in on us and started telling me it was reflective of a miserable childhood- on my part, not his."

"So you got Freud to analyze your sex life with a literary character."

"It made it all worth it."

Vote: Yay! 448 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1386

Non-IB Student: If a tree falls in the woods, and no one's around to hear it, does it make a sound?

IB Student: If no one is around to hear or see this "tree", how do you know it exists?

Non-IB Student: ...

IB Student: ...and then, if you've never been to this "wood", how do you know it exists?

Non-IB Student: ...

IB Student: Moreover, where are these "woods"? You have to examine it from a cultural aspect, as well.

Non-IB Student: ...JUST FORGET IT.

Vote: Yay! 1490 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1088

IB student: "This is your parietal bone..."

-talking to a dog while scratching its head.

Vote: Yay! 180 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #85

Student 1: In Shakespeare's Othello (pronounced Othayo) they come from the city of Venice (pronounced Venus).

Student 2: David, its OTHELLO, and VENICE. God, your an idiot.

[class hold back laughter]

Student 1: Oh!!! OK sorry. So Othayo...

[class bursts out laughing]

Vote: Yay! -12 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1084

"Spark Notes are too long."

-IB Senior

Vote: Yay! 478 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #2065

You know you are in IB:
when you go to a party and discuss the TOK essay you have due the following Friday.

Vote: Yay! 480 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #2058

Finishing IB is like coming home from war. You have been away for two years fighting battles, being ambushed by prep, preparing plans to destroy a history essay at dawn the next moring...
But then you go home and the world has changed, people have changed and you feel almost out of place...
It is fun because you know you came out of it alive, but ultimately the end of IB is a huge anti-climax....
your body is used to all the stress taken in 2 years and suddenly it is all gone...what to do?

Vote: Yay! 901 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1749

Whoever has time to come on this site is either not in IB or going to drop out of IB.

Vote: Yay! -1099 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1929

People who take Math SL are smart people. They know their limits.
~ Carl Frolund, 12th Grader at MKIS hahahahha good luck on exams Carl!

Vote: Yay! 233 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #166

What is IB? Alcatraz, and the subjects are the prisoners.

Vote: Yay! 39 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1017

(Flora Coughing)

Cathy: Are you okay?

Flora: Yeah, I just got some juice down my trachea.

Vote: Yay! 32 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #349

Lachlan: Have you noticed IB students type/write down everything you say?

Music Teacher: Yes, it scares me.

Vote: Yay! 94 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #581

The eternal TOK question: How do we know what we know?
The IB student answer: Because we memorised it!

Vote: Yay! 103 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #414

You know you're in IB when you can see individual air molecules vibrating

Vote: Yay! 44 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #72

Ms. Preston- Are there any questions about the essay question in the Walden test?
Student- Whats the question going to be?

Vote: Yay! 35 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #74

Mrs. Mahone, cherfully, in response to a complaining class:
"Welcome to IB!!!"

Vote: Yay! -27 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #366

Art teacher: Humans made time, therefore we control time!

Rest of art class, still freaking out about an art project due the next day despite the help.

Vote: Yay! 35 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #25

Ms. Shannon (when physics students were studying for a test in her room during lunch time): Why don't you guys go ask Ms. Birsan, if you don't get it?

Students look at each other and smile nervously: Because we are too chicken to ask her?

*collectively shrug*

Vote: Yay! -33 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1779

When an IB student does an assignment due the next day at 12 midnight, he says: "Good, I still have 6 hours left to finish it."

Vote: Yay! 1039 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #147

Student 1: Your mother is so fat that the only thing attractive about her is her gravity.

Student 2: Your mother is so fat, that she collapsed her own dimension

Student 1: Oh yeah, well your mother is so fat that she has the chance of reaching the speed of light

Student 2: Heh, well your mother is so fat that her Heisenberg uncertainty is zero.

Student 3: Don't mind me, I'm just passing by.

Vote: Yay! 179 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #846

IB French Teacher: You guys need to be able to write more complicated sentences! Let's practice some of our translating. Amy translate this into french: My french techer walked into class and jumped out of the window."

Amy: That's a bit morbid...

IB French Teacher: Ok ok, try this one "The french techer will throw Amy out of the window if she doesn't translate the last sentence". Better?

Vote: Yay! 118 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #680

Physics teacher: Who knows what the largest star is?
Rory: oh yeah I know this one, pretty sure I saw it last night.
Physics Teahcer: uh Rory that was the moon.
Rory: :O sir, no it wasn't ...it was bigger than that
Physics teacher: the sun then?

Vote: Yay! -26 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #447

Hey Todd! Your epididymis is showing!

Vote: Yay! -36 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #661

Student: So I was wondering... Why aren't we allowed to take five HL classes?
IB Coordinator: Because it looks bad for the IB program when students commit suicide.

Vote: Yay! 3026 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #2083

you know you've graduated from IB when you can't even write emails anymore without an essay question and a due date.

Vote: Yay! 159 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #214

I don’t even complain about IB anymore. It’s just a part of my life and I can’t even remember how life used to be…before I used to moan and whine about the program and wish I could have my life back. I can’t even remember what “life” is anymore. It has sucked all optimism and fun out of my teenage life…wait what life? Although insanity does have its perks…try bursting into tears of laughter after stories that have no meaning or significance except to keep us from doing our work.

Vote: Yay! 151 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1338

4 classes X (1 mole of classes/1 class) X (2 moles of homework/1 mole of classes) = 8 moles of homework a day!!!

Vote: Yay! -52 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1733

When God wanted to show himself to the world, he wrote "YHWH".

Then came Satan, he wrote "IB"

Vote: Yay! 593 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #418

IB Student: Aw man, I have a three hour French class after school today and I have a fever from swimming outside in the rain last night!

Non IB student: Why'd you even go to school!???

IB Student: *looks at other student weirdly* My well being is not my priority, my CAS hours are.

Vote: Yay! 84 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1233

IB stands for

Its Bullsh**

Vote: Yay! -32 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1223

Mom: Please, buy the white dress to wear to prom, it looks gorgeous on you!
Patricia: Noo, but I like this other one so much more. It'll be okay, I'll wear an even nicer white dress when I get married.
Mom: *squeaky voice* YOU DON'T HAVE TIME TO GET MARRIED, YOU'RE IN IB!
Patricia: ...Mom?

Vote: Yay! -14 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #637

I was procrastinating on YouTube and found this inspiring:

We are doing all these things to squeeze things together so we can save time (...) But we aren't guaranteed that time, all we have is 'here' and 'now' and that's why procrastination feels so right. Procrastination is not the problem, it's the solution!
(...) Procrastinate now! Don't put it off!
by Ellen DeGeneres.

Vote: Yay! 94 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #837

In Biology SL
Bio teacher- Sex is the F-word...
students-...
Teacher- Fertilization!
students-oops

Vote: Yay! 60 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #44

ToK teacher: (insert here a long, poetic and prestigious definition about what mathematics is). I think however that math... is a broccoli.

Vote: Yay! 186 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1979

IB Student making a maths joke: Did you see the asymptote on that motherfunction?

Vote: Yay! 244 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #406

I want to B ... dead

Vote: Yay! -44 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1998

You know you're in IB when you start organizing students based off of Aldous Huxley's Brave New World caste system.

IB Senior - Alpha
IB Junior - Beta
IB Sophomore - Gamma
IB Freshmen - Delta
AP Student - Epsilon

Vote: Yay! 269 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1273

You know you're in IB when you're given an extended lunch break and when the bell rings you start wondering what you could be doing in class.

Vote: Yay! 48 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1310

We don't even know why we are taking IB.

Vote: Yay! 227 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #337

IB Co-ordinator: If you really want to you can read the Harry Potter books as a Creativity for CAS.

Student: Can that count as Service?

Vote: Yay! 115 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #382

IB is like being ruled by facism:

Everyone talks about how much it has ruined their life but nobody actually does anything about it.

Vote: Yay! 460 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #520

----- NICOLA ----- QUEENSLANDER!!!!!!!!!!! says:
o yeh coz i can do chem while sleeping
»josh« says:
of course you can
»josh« says:
havent you heard of sleepworking?
»josh« says:
apparently IB students are very good at it...


this took place in an msn convo at 12:11am

Vote: Yay! 46 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1656

I was planning on dropping IB, but as it turns out I procrastinated on that too.

Vote: Yay! 1432 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #923

Dear Quote 717,
We are nerds. Whether voluntary or not, being in IB automatically makes us this way.

Vote: Yay! 81 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #443

Student: Have you ever heard of a river called Gonads?
Science Teacher: No, where is that?
Student (not expecting a serious response): Uhhh, between your le... ...South America somewhere.

Vote: Yay! 49 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1703

After the Christmas Holidays, the English Teacher asks us how our break was

Student1: It was great! The best part was staying up all night doing nothing...the worst part was staying up all night doing work.

Vote: Yay! 103 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1576

You know you're in IB when:
You brag about how you did the entire Frankenstein annotation in one day, instead of doing it when it was assigned.

Vote: Yay! 263 Nay! | Permalink