Browsing 50 random quotations.

Quote #680

Physics teacher: Who knows what the largest star is?
Rory: oh yeah I know this one, pretty sure I saw it last night.
Physics Teahcer: uh Rory that was the moon.
Rory: :O sir, no it wasn't ...it was bigger than that
Physics teacher: the sun then?

Vote: Yay! -26 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1337

History pun: When it comes to height, South Koreans have an inch off.

Vote: Yay! -123 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #2095

Only IB gives you true protection from the sun's UV rays...

Welcome to summer assignments.

Vote: Yay! 457 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #620

(A group of IB students are outside and see a rainbow)

Student: Look! Refracted light!

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Quote #1114

Teacher: The marks ranged from 37 to 3. Which is a good spread.

Vote: Yay! 89 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #301

(Sitting in lunch room, three students having a heated discussion about TOK)
Student 1: What solid proof do you have that man did land on the moon?!
Student 2: Compare yours to mine, a**hole!
Student 3: Will you both shut up?!!? If you dont, I'll spork you!
Student 1 & 2: O_O

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Quote #75

Student: Sir. For our french exam, how many essays do we need to write?

French Teacher: Umm, let me check.

Student: You're teaching IB french and have been for 3 years and you can't remember?

French Teacher: Well, I forgot.

Vote: Yay! -76 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1833

you know there's got to be something wrong with IB when:

1. you're at a party and you think, "this sucks, I could be doing homework right now!"

2.you argue with teachers over a 99

3.you view lunch as a short nap

Vote: Yay! 1062 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #783

HL bio teacher on prokaryotes: SO what do we know about these kinds of cells? They are the STRIPPERS of the CELL WORLD!!! You know why? Because they have NAKED DNA *starts humming a stripper sounding song* .. and what shape do they have? a COIL.. around BALLS! because they're attracted to BALLS, these naked DNA! are what? STRIPPERS OF THE CELL WORLD :)

class: O_O

Vote: Yay! 63 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #18

Alex: YESMAMNGF sda
Carson: ... What?
Alex: o my god
Alex: i seriously forgot what i was so happy about

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Quote #386

Ibid. (Latin, short for ibidem, "the same place") is the term used to provide an endnote or footnote citation or reference for a source that was cited in the preceding endnote or footnote.

IBID = International Baccalaureate Is Death.

Vote: Yay! 45 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1368

Patricia: Say something sweet and corny. <3<3
Nate: I don't know.
Patricia: Come on!
Nate: What’s your sine? It must be pi/2 because you’re the 1.
Patricia: ...Oh God.

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Quote #13

Mr. Oliver (IB Coordinator): Suwon, you're just jealous that I'm smarter than your cat.

Carson: I beg to differ.

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Quote #1511

You know you are in IB when...

You are on this site contributing, while in reality you should really be revising.

IB Brunei (:

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Quote #1372

The only way to pass ToK is to prove it does not exist.

Vote: Yay! 1209 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #734

School's Morning Announcements: The Terry Fox Run will be next week in second period!
Patricia: But I don't wanna miss biology to run. Do we get CAS hours?

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Quote #1687

You know you're in IB when you discover the aesthetic beauty of school supplies.

Vote: Yay! 377 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #154

Katie: So you know that's saying a lot if you're willing to eat a note for your country.
(Final Presentation on Women of the American Revolution)

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Quote #76

NO, I can't wake up yet, I don't have a conclusion.

(a thought I had just before waking up, didn't have a conclusion in whatever dream I was having).

Vote: Yay! 213 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #2109

Most recent jokes ive heard ..

IB student - "your mums so fat she causes dark flow"

A level student - "wht do women call it PMT.

As mad cow desease was already taken"...

Seriously... we can see a distinct differnce :P

Vote: Yay! -283 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #639

Since you are procrastinating anyway, do the following drawing that was presented to the BSRJ History HL students by the very talented Mr. Nash ("talented" was not sarcastic, he's awesome):

1. Draw a circle and call it Germany.
2. Draw another circle right underneath it and call it Austria.
3. Erase the junction to form a butt-looking Anschluss.
4. Draw a long horizontal cylindric/oval shape with one end (western border, i.e. left end) touching the junction and call it Czechoslovakia.
5. Outline the left tip of Czechoslovakia and call it the Sudetenland.
6. Now, draw a small horizontal line through the Sudetenland to indicate the path of the troops.

Can you believe this map was drawn accidentally?

Vote: Yay! 10 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1252

"What's the point of prom?"
"To celebrate your graduation from IB!"
"Why can't we just celebrate that by going home and sleeping for more than 5 hours?"
"...ooh, that sounds fun."

Vote: Yay! 990 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #205

A Math teacher at RHS:

Biologists think they're chemists
Chemists think they're physicists
Physicists think they're God BUT
God thinks he's a mathematician!

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Quote #1024

IB- Internal Brain damage

TOK- Theory of Killing self

CAS- Creates Assignment Shit

EE- 4000 words.."EEEEEEEE"

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Quote #2105

IB is only two years. Hell is eternal. So it's worth it... riiiight?

Vote: Yay! -42 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1689

It's a beautiful day outside, the sun is shining, the birds are chirping.... LET'S GO TO THE LIBRARY!!!

Vote: Yay! 377 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #266

History teacher concerning Paper 1:

Origin, purpose, value and limitation - OPVL. If you don't do this I will find you in the middle of the night and do nasty things to you.

(most quotes of this type come with random dances..)

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Quote #800

Two IB students: (one bent over in front of the other)
IB Chemistry teacher: HEY! No covalent bonding without C3H3N!

Vote: Yay! -17 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #2071

Ib student: wow. its creepy out here.

ib student #2: If i get kidnapped...can u hand in my math investigation?

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Quote #406

I want to B ... dead

Vote: Yay! -44 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #413

Normal teacher : Okay class, we are having a test next class.
Normal students: Sure.

IB Chemistry teacher: We are having a test on electrolysis next class.
IB student: But Mr. Parker, we CANNOT do it cause of our History paper (due in 3 weeks) and our English essay on Oedipus (due in 2 weeks).
IB Chemistry teacher: Oh sheesh. Okay.

We are the biggest whiners and liars ever!

Vote: Yay! 84 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1119

ib spelling: today's word, acquaintance

Dina says:
i just spelled it out thouh
Dina says:
*though
Dina says:
like, aqquaintance
Dina says:
ahah
Dina says:
wow thats pretty bad
Dusan says:
hahaha
Dusan says:
2 q's?
Dusan says:
wtf!
Dina says:
yeah i dunno
Dina says:
i like putting double letters in big words
Dina says:
cause most big words have two letters that are the same consecutively
Dina says:
so
Dina says:
just to be on the safe side
Dina says:
yknow
Dusan says:
hahaha

Vote: Yay! -314 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #2082

You know you are in IB when you are too busy to think about suicide.

Vote: Yay! 212 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #338

IB students don't procrastinate ... we just have an accute sense for prioritization.

Vote: Yay! 400 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #137

Maths teacher after deciding his students were working too quickly leaves the room to go and get more questions.

Student 1 drops her pen and lunges for her bag. Student 2 thinks she wants her calcualtor to work it out and quickly puts it on her table. Student 1 looks back up with a clementine.

Student 1: I didn't want a calculator, I wanted this! (holds up
clementine)

Vote: Yay! -65 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #624

IB Student 1: So have you been watching "Project Runway"?
IB Student 2: No, I swore off TV when my Chem grade dropped to an A minus. How do you have time to watch TV?
IB Student 1: I'm telling you, TiVo was invented for IB students.

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Quote #400

If I get a hundred on every test for the rest of the year...

Vote: Yay! 112 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #685

IB student: " What's the use of girlfriend if you can't get a perfect score for your biology?"

Non IB student : " Now tell me, How do you practise Biology if you can't get a girlfriend?"

Vote: Yay! 114 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #191

"Is this side 1?"

"Of course it is, that's a f*cking unit circle."

Vote: Yay! 29 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #223

Discussing a valentines day party:

English Teacher: So if you bring valentines, bring one for everyone. I don't want one kid getting none and another getting 5.

Michael: But that's reality!

English Teacher: Be quiet Michael, I'm doing you a favor. You won't get any anyways.

Vote: Yay! 185 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #627

Mark of an IB Student -

Friendster Last Login: Before IB

Vote: Yay! 33 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #2030

( Teacher talking to sophmore pre- IB about IB)

Teacher: You guys should stay in the program because it is a challenge. Its good too challenge yourself.

Student: Well swimming with sharks is a challenge?

Teacher: Who wants to take a dive?

Vote: Yay! -57 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #998

The impact of IB Biology HL:

My sister was making some yam fries for our family as I was typing my chemistry lab. While I was still working, my ever-so-caring sister brings me a bowl of these fries, expecting an expression of gratitude. I glanced at the food.

My first response was "They look like spindle-shaped muscle cells."

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Quote #1912

"You know you're in IB when you hope that someone will get swine flu, because then everyone would get swine flu and you wouldn't have to go to school for a week."

Vote: Yay! 289 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1898

Non-IB Student: I just got 75 hours of community service for getting caught drinking last month.
IB Student: I've got 150 to do.
Non-IB Student: DAMN, what'd you do?!

Vote: Yay! 497 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #632

Q: How many IB students does it take to change a light bulb?

A: 30. One to change the bulb, and twenty-nine to reflect on the process.

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Quote #898

You fought in Iraq? That's nothing, I did IB.

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Quote #1292


~~Physics
Textbook "If you had a choice of being hit by a child on a bicycle or an adult on a bicycle travelling at half the velocity of the child, which would you pick?"

(After spending half an hour working it out)

Student 1: You know, in that amount of time, you could have just moved out of the way.

Vote: Yay! 423 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #536

Quotes overheard in various classes. It's a wonder half of these people are even in the IB:
"I don't have palm cards, I have arm cards"- Nobby decided to cut his entire speech up and use them for his oral
"Just because you yell it doesn't mean you're right!!"- she yelled.
"Is pasta vegetarian?"
"I can't make my words any..uh..un-smarter than they already are"- as evident by that sentence, Nobby
"I'm spoonerific!"- a discussion about the differences between dislexia and spoonerisms. From Nobby
"The law is you have to cover your various naughty bits"- TOK
"Your fingers are like delicate little children"
"Water shouldn't be bottled..it should be free..and stuff"- ethics of bottling water

Vote: Yay! -11 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #8

IB is a very religious program... everyone think he's God.

Vote: Yay! 84 Nay! | Permalink