Browsing 50 random quotations.

Quote #265

If you're an IB student, you actually have an IB dance to release stress when your IB coordinator comes in and reminds you of the work you kept on procrastinating.

Vote: Yay! 36 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #390

"Welcome to IB History, you are all in deep shiiit"
-IB History Teacher

Vote: Yay! 82 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1040

IB Student: How many copies do you make a year? Don't you care about the environment?
A1 Teacher: Don't worry. For every 1000 copies I make I plant a tree.
IB Students: Awwww, that's great! Really?
A1 Teacher: No. I'm actually in a fight with all the trees. I'm winning.

Vote: Yay! 154 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #719

Ever wondered if you could count banging your head against the wall as action hours?

Vote: Yay! 295 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #230

I BS CAS hours!

Vote: Yay! -42 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #300

The International Baccalaureate: The only educational program owned, run, and sponsered by satan himself.

Vote: Yay! 1306 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #350

IB Maths student: Why did we do that?

IB Maths teacher: Because the question asked.

Vote: Yay! 40 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #939

Ms. Samele (IB Coordinator): Okay, I need your guys' help with...
Class (cutting her off): NO NO NO NO We're busy as shit! NO
Ms. Samele: ...and the pizza's on IB.
Class: FOOD?? WHERE? We'll do it!!

Vote: Yay! 77 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1639

If you are in IB and you ever find yourself without any homework to do one evening then one of the following events must be true:

1. You're forgetting something.
2. Something is wrong with your planner.
3. You're about to wake up in a few minutes.

Vote: Yay! 3217 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #185

Physics Teacher: SO, if we cut the wire that holds up the elevator you would be in a weightless sutiation... But then it would crash... So you really wouldn't have much time to enjoy your weightlessness.

Vote: Yay! 54 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #138

Maths Teacher after being asked about tree diagrams and how they work: It's like being
dyslexic once you know you can compensate.

Vote: Yay! -11 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #22

Have you noticed that the physics stuff is almost like math? There's not a single number in my notes!

Vote: Yay! 137 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #182

TOK teacher: I remember I once met a woman who had a flashback from a bad trip. She got into the fetal position and thought she was a turnip.

Vote: Yay! 51 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1952

Lunch time study session:
A: "GOD, why are we spending so much time discussing existentialism?!"
B: "So we pass the IB English Exam, get our IB Dimploma, and get accepted to an Ivy League."
*C: "You know, the whole 'you'll get into a great college' thing is probably just something that we've trained ourselves to say so that we don't smask our heads in with our Chem books."
A: "You've ruined my inner peace."
B: "Ahh, but if you followed existentialist beliefes you wouldn't be influenced by her rational thought."
A: "If I were an existentialist I wouldn't be in the IB."
C: "I hate you so much"

Vote: Yay! 198 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #96

IB, therefore I BS.

Vote: Yay! 714 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #533

Mrs. M.: Tea Cake's real name is Vergeable Woods.
Me: Haha Mrs. M., that sounds like a pornstar name.

Vote: Yay! -30 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #776

The Five Stages of Death:
Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance

The Five Stages of IB:
Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance

Vote: Yay! 172 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #928

(IB Students are discussing upcoming field trip to Presidential Inauguration in January)

Teacher coordinating fiedl trip: It will be really cold, guys. You may be standing outside for five hours in 10 degree weather.
Student: Can we get action hours for that?

Vote: Yay! 145 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #74

Mrs. Mahone, cherfully, in response to a complaining class:
"Welcome to IB!!!"

Vote: Yay! -27 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #551

"You start with your tongue at the top and work your way down. Or you bite off the bottom and suck it all out. See? In an ice cream cone, order makes all the difference!"

- Math HL teacher, on combinatorics

Vote: Yay! -17 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #611

(students talking excitedly in Bio Class)
Bio Teacher: i just finished grading your cell test...

complete silence...

(Non-IB teacher walks by...)
Non-IB teacher: i wonder how he commands so much respect from his students..."confused look"

Vote: Yay! 75 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #264

IB, therefore I am.

Vote: Yay! 29 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1394

I wonder if there is an IB rehab program. If so i'm getting my reservation.

Vote: Yay! 316 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #93

Student: Haha, and then he was laughing so hard.

Math teacher: What are you doing?

Student: Nothing...


Vote: Yay! -67 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1215

Student 1: I have calculated the angle at which you can place your laptop so people passing by and the teacher won't notice you're on Facebook!

Vote: Yay! 160 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #645

C: Did you hear the one about the guy who owned the hotel?
J: No...
C: Don't worry, it's an inn-side joke
J: *blank look*
C:*writes it down*
B: That's not even funny

C and J do IB
B does not

Vote: Yay! 58 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #206

History teacher: "By the end of IB, you're going to know Stalin better than your own grandfather!"

Vote: Yay! 702 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1017

(Flora Coughing)

Cathy: Are you okay?

Flora: Yeah, I just got some juice down my trachea.

Vote: Yay! 34 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #637

I was procrastinating on YouTube and found this inspiring:

We are doing all these things to squeeze things together so we can save time (...) But we aren't guaranteed that time, all we have is 'here' and 'now' and that's why procrastination feels so right. Procrastination is not the problem, it's the solution!
(...) Procrastinate now! Don't put it off!
by Ellen DeGeneres.

Vote: Yay! 96 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #388

History IA is a BITCH.

Only, it can't be settled with a fight.

Vote: Yay! -38 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #172

During a TOK discussion

Student 1: I believe that opinions don't matter.
Student 2: So what you just said doesn't matter?

Vote: Yay! 309 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #2080

IBO really stands for I Believe in Oppression

Vote: Yay! 169 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1950

Student: I wish you would conserve paper more, you don't have to hurt the trees!
Teacher: Well, "teacher" is derived from the Portuguese word for "tree-killer."
Student: Really???
Teacher: No. But I do plant a tree for every thousand papers I use.
Student: Really???
Teacher: No!!

Vote: Yay! 113 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #923

Dear Quote 717,
We are nerds. Whether voluntary or not, being in IB automatically makes us this way.

Vote: Yay! 81 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1497

IB pickup line:
Baby, I'll treat you like my homework. I'll slam you on the table and do you all night long.

Vote: Yay! 3426 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1929

People who take Math SL are smart people. They know their limits.
~ Carl Frolund, 12th Grader at MKIS hahahahha good luck on exams Carl!

Vote: Yay! 234 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #117

Get online at 4 am...
find three of my IB friends still online.
one's away message says "finishing Internal Assessment"
the next, "procrastinating on Internal Assessment"
the last one, "finally done with Internal Assessment!"

Vote: Yay! 274 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #472

Pre IB student: I'm in grade 8, but I'm thinking of going into grade 10 next year so I can start IB

IB students: **SHOCK** puhahahahhahaha

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Quote #67

The number 45 never looked so high until now...

Vote: Yay! 2256 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #401

In math studies:

Mrs. Zuniga: What are angles called when they're less than 90 degrees?

class: acute

Mrs. Zuniga: What are they called when they're more than 90 degrees?

class: obtuse

Mrs. Zuniga: How about when they're more than 180 degrees?

Melissa: ....obese

Vote: Yay! 112 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1896

"The International Baccalaureate Primary Years Programme (PYP) is designed for students aged 3 to 12"

HAHAHA, who are they kidding? poor 3 year olds.

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Quote #108

IB is an invitation to suicide.

Vote: Yay! 89 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #620

(A group of IB students are outside and see a rainbow)

Student: Look! Refracted light!

Vote: Yay! 246 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #650

IB is mentally raping me..

Vote: Yay! -10 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #208

Geography Teacher: Why is deforestation such a problem?

Student: Because people are cutting down trees


Teacher: Yes, because the word deforestation means to cut down trees. But why are people cutting down trees?

Student: Because they have nothing better to do.

*Cue even more laughter*

Vote: Yay! -29 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #2090

Me: "Mum, I'm finding the IB really hard at the moment"
Mum: "It's not THAT bad"
Me: How would you know?
Mum: I don't know; I like it that way.

Vote: Yay! 104 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #567

Ever have those IB hell-days where you ask the voices in your head what's wrong with you and they don't know either?

Vote: Yay! 1023 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #1109

IB has taught me many useful things in terms of multitasking and time management. Only in IB are you capable of crying while finishing your IA and not only be able to see the paper perfectly, but not get a single tear on the page because you don't have time to redo it.

Vote: Yay! 340 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #50

I absolutely HATE all people who have biased opinions.

Vote: Yay! 107 Nay! | Permalink

Quote #98

Chem Teacher: Did you guys hear about the bear that fell in the water and dissolved?

Class: No...

Chem Teacher: They say he was polar!

Vote: Yay! 423 Nay! | Permalink